UPSTART Swedes have delivered a further blow to Scotland’s fast food pre-eminence by revealing the 4,000 calorie “volcano pizza”.
Scots were appalled to discover recently that Swedes had invented a 2,000 calorie ‘calskrove’ – a calzone stuffed with burger and chips – which makes the 1,200-calorie deep-fried Mars Bar supper look almost healthy.
Now our Nordic cousins have rubbed salt into the wound by revealing that the “calskrove” is just for starters.
The Vulkan pizza – which translates as ‘volcano pizza’ – is star-shaped and topped with diced steak, bacon, pepperoni, cucumber, tomato, red onion, lettuce, cheese, and fries.
Swedish newspaper, The Local, reported:: “Scotland’s outrage over being outdone has since made its way back to Sweden, but there’s more bad news on the way.
“A user at Reddit Sweden has pointed out that the Calskroven has long since been overtaken in the horrible food stakes by another Swedish invention, the Vulkan pizza.”
Scots are now openly plotting revenge on the Swedes.
User the_oncoming_storm wrote on social media: “Seriously, we do need to outdo this. Who owns a chippy?”
Whilst BesottedScot wrote: “Brilliant. Any c*** on here own a chippy so we can outdo the smörgåsbording b*******?”
Another redditer, known as Cooslick, just expressed admiration for the volcano pizza.
He said: “I’m not usually overly emotional but I genuinely near burst into tears when I saw that picture [of the vulkan pizza], such was the depth of my urge to get stuck in.”
He then suggested a potential source of Scotland’s comeback, writing: “Does anybody remember the Stonner Supper that made it into the news about 10 year ago? Sausage wrapped in doner meat, battered, deep fried. “1 per customer, per week” Sadly it wasn’t the best of chippies, but those guys had vision.”