Wednesday, August 17, 2022
NewsAmerican asks for advice about not getting stabbed at Old Firm game...

American asks for advice about not getting stabbed at Old Firm game – Scots come to the rescue

SCOTS football fans have come to the aid of an American who asked for advice about going to an Old Firm game – without getting stabbed.

The unidentified American posted on social media site Reddit to explain that he was coming to Scotland in “the fall” to see Rangers vs Celtic and wanted advice on staying safe.

The user, known as swagginball-z, posted on Reddit yesterday saying: “I’m gonna be in Scotland for a few months in the fall, I might try to catch Celtic vs Rangers while I’m there.

“Anyone have any suggestions on how to not get stabbed?”


The top reply came from a user known as niconpat, who said: “0% stab: Don’t go. 20% stab: Go as a neutral with a non-Scottish accent. 40% stab: Go as a neutral with a Scottish accent. 60% stab: Support the opposing team with a non-Scottish accent.

“80% stab: Support the opposing team with a Scottish accent. 100% stab: Support either team with an American accent.”


Another user added: “Don’t mention religion and if anyone asks just say you’re not religious.

“Don’t wear any football shirt, don’t sit in the corner as they tend to be where all the nutters are and don’t say you’re half something because that’s very annoying.”

Whilst another called Dougy_AM, said: “Being a tourist won’t get you in trouble in. Being a tourist that is trying to act as if they are a local will get your head kicked in.”

sc2assie wrote: “I’ve been, don’t wear any jersey or any green or blue at all. Ideally go with someone you know but if not research where you’re sitting and have a plan for every step you take from hotel to seat in stadium back to hotel.


One user added: “Go to a Scotland game instead, it would be a way better experience.”

But another quickly hit back, quipping: “I thought he wanted to see a football game?”

The American eventually replied to all the advice by saying: “How about supporting neither team with an American accent?”

To which he was told: “That is covered by the 20% stab insurance policy.”

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