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How to Hook Up With a Friends With Benefits While Being Discreet


There’s no hiding the fact that friends with benefits type partnerships often get a bad rep. People often look down on these partnerships because the driving factor is often more physical than actually wanting to pursue a future with someone. Nevertheless, society has become a lot more accepting of these types of commitment-free partnerships in recent years. These days, women are often praised for going after these types of partnerships proudly, because it shows that they aren’t ashamed to pursue what they really want and what truly serves them. It’s only natural to still have the desire for the sexual aspect of a relationship, even if you’re not at a place in life when your ready to fully commit to a significant other.

Being in a friends with benefits type partnership is empowering because the ball is in your court. You get to call the shots and there is really no pressure to take the relationship to the next level. There are really plenty of advantages to this type of relationship and if you go into it with the right mindset, you can really get a lot of satisfaction and enjoyment out of it.

Nevertheless, you might not want all your friends and family to know about this special partnership just yet. Maybe you’re worried that they’ll be judgmental or warn you that you’re not making the best decision. Maybe you just don’t want to answer a million questions about your friend with benefits and want to keep things more private.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

There are definitely ways to maintain a friend with benefits type partnership while staying discreet and maintaining your privacy. Elon Stern, the Co-founder of Fwbdr, the popular FWB dating and NSA casual hookup community shows out a few tips and tricks to do just that.

Figure out a Routine for Hookups

If you live in a college dorm or small apartment and share your close quarters with another person, chances are you feel like you have next to no privacy a lot of the time. Your roommate could walk in at any minute and there’s not much of a way to hide any type of relationship you might be involved in. After all, your roommate is there when you wake up and most likely there when you go to sleep.

The key for making a friends with benefits type relationship work in this sort of scenario is really getting a routine down. Does your roommate usually have classes in the afternoon and will be out on campus until dinner? If so, this might be the perfect window of time for you to have a hookup with your friend with benefits. You’re sure to have a good couple of hours where you’ll have uninterrupted time and won’t have to be paranoid about your roommate walking in at any minute.

If you find that you’re simply not getting enough time with your own room to yourself to engage in private time with your significant other, it may be a good idea to consider hooking up at your partners place. If he has his own living space to himself, you won’t have to be paranoid about someone walking in or asking questions if they see you too together.

Avoid Engaging with One Another on Social Medias

This may seem like a given, but the place where rumors originate is quite often social media. Avoid posting photos of your friend with benefits on Snapchat, Instagram, or other similar platforms. If your friends see you posing with someone that you’ve not yet introduced to them, they’re probably going to be suspicious about the individual. If you’re not yet ready or willing to tell everyone in your life about your friend with benefits, it’s best to just keep them off your socials altogether.

Don’t Hang out in Public Places

If you decide to spend time with your friend with benefits in locations outside of your own homes, be aware that you are running the risk of being recognized. You might think that dropping by your local college bar with your friend with benefits for a few drinks is no big deal. However, if you’re really want to keep your friend with benefits partnership on the down low, this might not be the best idea. If you really want to hang out with your friend with benefits in a public place, choose to do so in a more remote location where you’re less likely to run into people you know. This way you can continue to keep your relationship private and won’t have to answer questions about your significant other.

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