Kirkcaldy gets a kicking from Urban Dictionary


ONE of the world’s most popular websites has caused a storm after branding a Scottish town as full of “contorted and inbred psychopaths”.

Urban Dictionary goes on to brand Kirkcaldy, Fife, as the “final resting place of Satan” where hobbies include “heroin, pregnancy and begging”.

The remarks on the California-based online dictionary – which anyone can contribute to – were described as disgusting by the local MSPs yesterday (Tue).

Kirkcaldy – where former PM Gordon Brown went to school – is said by the Urban Dictionary to be “a ‘community’ in the same way a prison island for the criminally insane is also a ‘community’ not to mention is also the final resting place of Satan”.

The dictionary, which is visited by 15 million people a month, adds: “It is situated along the rusted trolley-ridden coastline of the county of Fife in the post-apocalyptic wasteland of Scotland.

“Local past times include heroin, alcoholism, pregnancy, begging and aggressive homophobia and racism, STD trading parties (or as the locals like to call it “goin oot clubbin lod”) .

“For the most part the people of Kirkcaldy are contorted and inbred psychopaths who sound like pirates and smell of cigars and damp socks.

“Perhaps the one thing that unites all of the people of Kirkcaldy is their utter disgust for Glenrothes. Which is the nearest town and can best be described as ‘Kirkcaldy but with lots of roundabouts’.”

The town that education former PM Gordon Brown is full of "contorted and inbred psychopaths" according to an entry on California-based Urban Dictionary
The town that education former PM Gordon Brown is full of “contorted and inbred psychopaths” according to an entry on California-based Urban Dictionary


Local MSP David Torrance said: “I’m absolutely disgusted by the comments on this website.

“At the end of the day, people reading that will have in their minds an impression of what this town is and I’m really annoyed by what’s on there.”

The SNP politician added: “It’s a town I’m passionate about and I would advise whoever wrote it to visit Kirkcaldy to see for themselves the areas of real natural beauty.

“We have a mixture of different types of housing, from social housing to affluent areas, a positive outlook for jobs thanks to the renewables sector and an excellent college.

“Obviously the person who wrote that doesn’t know Kirkcaldy very well.”

Mid Scotland and Fife MSP Claire Baker complained: “The website may claim this is a bit of fun, but it will be highly offensive to many people and is deeply unfair to the town and the people of Kirkcaldy.

“Kirkcaldy is a town which has much to offer, with a vibrant cultural scene, a first-class college and many businesses investing in the town.

“Of course, Kirkcaldy is feeling the impact of the economic downturn, but it has a positive future and websites such as this do not reflect the town.”

Kirkcaldy is not the only part of Scotland to suffer at the hands of the Urban Dictionary.

Glasgow is described as “Paris after a nuclear Holocaust”.

Aberdeen, meanwhile, is: “Famous for its terrible weather and casual violence, it also has the dubious honour of being the most radioactive city in Britain – due mostly to all the buildings being made out of granite, which slowly releases radon gas.”

Edinburgh gets dishonourable mention for its trams. The site states: “If you see a tram in Edinburgh you might want to check that you are not actually in Blackpool, as the silly b******* have been trying, and failing, to build a tram system since about the same time they threw the castle up.”

And Falkirk is “A Dead town which sucks the life out of its inhabitants and anyone within a 500-mile radius”.


  1. Well, on some levels, the truth hurts.?. Especially Edinburgh, with its billion-pound tram sham money grab for the bureaucrats and council.

  2. David Torrance (MSP) is a fool.

    1 – it was almost certainlywritten by someone who lives in or near Kirkcaldy

    2 – it is a bit of a joke

    3 – making headline news of it spreadsd the flames, rather than suppresses them

    4 – it isn’t far from the truth!

    Another SNP idiot wasting public funds in a desperate bid for more power, and the death of Scotland through Independence

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